The Munchies. 2/7/2005
I was in the corner restaurant where I usually get my take away dinner yesterday night, placing an order for noodles and some deep fried spare ribs. The place was fairly crowded, and I sat down at an empty table, smoking a roll-up, whilst waiting for my order to arrive. The girl who looks after the till was kind enough to bring me a glass of Chinese tea, and asked me what my plans were for the long Lunar New Year break. We were making idle conversation, and I was looking around the restuarant, at the other diners.
I looked across the restaurant, and at a big round table, was a family having their Sunday dinner. Mom, Dad, grandma, several kids, a baby, an Indonesian maid. And I noticed something about this family. They had ordered stuff like crabs, and a fish dish, and chicken and other things. The table was loaded. And they were eating like a swarm of hungry locusts. Nothing was safe. I saw the mother pick up a crab claw, and use her teeth to crack the shell. Her teeth must have been made from titanium or something, because I didn’t even see her wince.
And this family were all eating with their mouths open. It was disgusting. From the father on down, they were munching and chewing and talking, and all the time they were talking to each other, with their mouths full of food. They were spitting bits of bone and fat out on the tablecloth. Even the baby had food drooling out of his mouth.
And the only person sitting there, showing a little sense of decorum, eating with her mouth closed, was the maid.