Wet crotch riding. 3/21/2007
The one unfortunate thing about riding a motorcycle is that you are exposed to the elements. There are times when I am grateful that I have year round riding weather where I am, unlike my buddies here, here and here. OK, year round is relative. Gary once did an entire winter season on 2 wheels, for which he has my respect, and a heart felt “You’re fucking crazy man”. I’ve ridden in snow and ice, and I have no desire to repeat the experience, unless I really have to, like running out of weapons grade plutonium or something. So I luxuriate in being able to ride anytime of the day or night, whenever I feel like it, or the need arises.
Coming back to the unfortunate thing, yesterday morning saw me staring out the window at grey skies and a persistent drizzle. I considered taking the truck in to work, but I woke up late, and didn’t fancy spending the next two hours sitting in a traffic jam practising bladder control. I decided to ride in anyway, in spite of the fact that riding in the rain is not something I like to do much anymore. In the rain on an open highway is fine. Riding in the rain splitting lanes in heavy city traffic is lethal.
I pulled on my rain gear, and headed off to do the good fight with the traffic. I was taking things easy. Not because I didn’t trust my riding skills of Bikebike, but because rain makes drivers do stupid things. They no longer keep to a constant speed for one thing. And some of them drive too fast, or too slowly, or too close, for the prevailing road conditions. SO I rode hyper aware, leaving myself lots of escape routes, keeping the brakes covered, with the bike in a lower gear than is usual.
I prefered to have the bike ready for anything. I got to work safely, with only a few drivers getting a blast of the horn, or a quick thump on the window to get their attention. As I stripped off my rain suit, I thought about the differences between riding in the dry, and riding in the wet.
I’ve spent a huge amount of time on two wheels, more than most, but less than others. And I have ridden in various types of road, dirt, mud, tarmac, salt flat. You name it, I’ve very probably ridden on it. Also in all types of weather. Sometimes, I didn’t have a choice, because a motorcycle was my only available mode of transportation. So, out of sheer necessity, I became rather adept and handling variable weather conditions on my motorcycle.
I soon realised that the key to riding in the rain was smoothness, smooth like butter. No sudden twists of the throttle, no grabbing of the brakes, no sudden changes of direction. I applied these techniques to my track riding, and it soon paid dividends. After a time, whenever a race was held in bad weather, I was better than even money to win the race, or place strongly. A few of the guys started calling me “the king of rain”, a pun on the Police song that was in the charts at the time.
I’ve slowed down a lot, since then. I explore the edge of the envelope now and again, and sometimes even step outside the envelope, standing on the glued portion of the flap, looking around for the devil, and kicking him in the crotch when he shows up, on my way to taking another machine right to the limits of tyre adhesion. But not these days. I prefer to end my rides standing up, with adrenaline coursing through my veins, as opposed to having a M.O. taking my patient history, and a nurse treating me like a pin cushion trying to intubate me for the saline drip.
So, returning to wet riding. I still hate the fact that no matter what rain suit I wear, I still end up with a wet crotch.
- Posted in : On the road
- Author : thesnark
Comments»
Haha. Great post. I’m glad I found your blog on WhyBike.
I’ve added your site to BikerSeek.com
:-)
Cheers!
Oh man, that is SO true! Even my wonderful Aerostich has left me with a wet crotch once, and that really surprised me. But the positions our bikes force us into make the crotch the catch-point for moisture, when faced with the combined effects of acceleration and gravity.
I’m looking at two months of rainy weather ahead, but I’m not going to start riding in earnest until the salt is washed from the roads. On the dry days, I’ll be out there, salt and sand be-damned, but when the brine rules the roads, I’ll be driving.
Ride well,
=gc=
What u say is correct. Wet riding always result in wet crotch.
Yeah… I usually end up with a dry top and a soaking bottom as well. Not exactly very professional when u reach the office…
Dan : Thanks.
Gary : It’s even worse when you wear khakis and get wet crotch. Everyone looks at you and thinks you wet yourself.
Horny AM : Wet crotch is good for a girl, not so great for guys.
cmos : That’s why I keep a change of clothes in my desk drawer.
quote from a Bloodrunners T-shirt: “Don’t tempt fate; taunt it”
And, less prosaically, there is a condition in the UK known as Despatch Rider’s Dick, whereby constant soaking, in freezing conditions, for 10 hours a day, causes the member in question to become prune like and shriveled. ;( And it’s damn difficult to “unwrap” under one of those hot air blowers in service stations without causing alarm amongst the regular punters
Fortunately it is reversible when summer arrives, bringing with it a whole new set of problems, when the streets are lined with “Girl Fridays” and the leather has to expand…:)
Grant : That banana run in yet? Let’s go riding.
you musterbated while riding your bike? I don’t believe it was the water. It should be gluey and slimy!
My Banana is only getting short bursts at the moment, due to staff crises at the Cafe (meaning I actually have to do some work).
I’ll let you know when I can get some space to breathe, then we’ll ride.
(Plus every bloody time I go to get ready when time permits, the heavens open! No bloody luck, I tells you!)